Monday, March 13, 2006
Identity Crisises and Expectations Observed
To kickstart her annotations of identity observations and discussions, P would like to point out that when it comes to the subject of human attraction, especially in taking on a lover, her preference is not dictated by the colour of one's skin.
She is what she termed herself as "a-racial".
The aura of the potential lover takes precedence over everything. That includes her strong appeal for good intellect.
****
The Banana
When P lived a short-lived charmed life out in Paris where she learnt under couture legends that once worked at the House of Balengciaga and the House of Chanel, she was one of the two pure Asians amongst the disciples.
The other girl was an American Chinese girl. A New Yorker. She took great effort initially to distant herself from P and applied major dexterity in associating herself with the white girls. Until, P became to most popular girl in her class.
This, being a result of P's sociable and open personality. Her peers and her mentor deemed her interesting and lacking in the conservative and calculativeness that is associated with the Chinese race.
It appeared that P's Chinese friend, C would not date an Asian man, for the same reason that their white peers have had generalised of Asians. P also understood that she has a very male chauvinistic father who caused much discontent in her parents' marriage.
So she never dated an Asian. She attempted to disengage herself from being associated with all things Chinese. She deemed Asian men all as male chauvinistic and screwed up.
As P has a fussy "Asian" palate that did not take kindly to having baguettes or crossiants as part of her daily diet and would often insist on buying Chinese takeaway, C would remarked, "You are being so Chinese."
"Don't you think I am so crossed-over?" she would sometimes ask the group boastfully (perhaps for assurance that she is beginning to "whiten", if not in her physical appearance, at least her soul) as she would recount the number of white men that she has dated.
Banana- white on the inside, yellow on the outside.
The funny thing is, C is a "Chinese" through and through.
If ever there is such a thing as a typical "Mandarin" face. C has small slit eyes, thick lips and wide mouth. Her nose is a good normal size, face is a long oval and she has the straightest and blackest shoulder-length hair that a blue blooded oriental could have.
And she has also revealed that her ultimate dream in life is to get married and be a mother; just like any compliant and virtuous Chinese wife should aspire to be.
****
In Between
Dope likes to think of himself as more asian than caucasian because of his restraint and his conservative personality he associated with the Asian culture. He attributed this to his Asian biased upbringing from his Chinese mother who ran the household and his lack of contact from the estranged side of his Caucasian father's family.
When Dope was growing up, he went to a Boys' Grammar School. Therein, he was one of the six non-caucasian boys. Well, not quite, since he is partly white. So he stood solo as the only Eurasian boy who got picked on a lot at school. For a lack of clear distinction in his racial identity.
Dope was constantly teased by the white boys as somewhat of a freak while he was regarded with warmer solidarity from his Asian peers. He was deemed a privilege to his Asian group of friends who attempted to seek entry and acceptance into the caucasian community. So he was bestowed with an unspoken superiority and respect within this group.
At university, he started hanging out mostly with Asian guys with the increased choice of cultural diversity. He felt it a natural transition.
It appears that dick sizes comprised a good part of male locker room discussions for that age. So Dope came to being in one of these situations. Being the more sterotypically conservative Asian crowd, comparisons amongst his peers were so much confined only to the measurements of the hand spans, and not extended to actual public displays. Dope, being a very tall and lanky individual won in the finger measurement contest.
The penis envy experienced by his Asian friends was quickly translated to jealousy. They accused his truimphant manhood as a given case of his "whiteness", an attempt to reconcile their differences through his "otherness".
Herein, Dope continues to live on the social pheriphery where he served as the integration point for the duality of his race and paradoxically, as an outsider when deemed fit by his pure blooded peers.
*****
The Egg
Long ago, P met a guy at university. Being as caucasian as anyone could tell, with a deep interest in the Asian culture and who spoke Japanese fluently and mandarin in the works, he explained his deepfelt connection with the Asian race. The Asian race, however, consist of vast and varied ethnicities. Nontheless, he summarised himself aptly.
"I am like an egg- white on the outside, yellow on the inside."
So that was how P came to be acquainted with "the egg".
****
The Coconut
During one of C's bantering sessions of drawing attention to herself as a cross-over, P mentioned about her introduction to the term "egg".
It was here that C added another term to P's vocabulary of the mistaken and the confused soul, "the coconut".
Definition of the "coconut"- black on the outside and white on the inside, a main reference to the Indian race.
****
M's Observations
"The Chinese must be the most racist race against their own kind," M remarked.
He searched P's face for an answer.
"I don't know. Why? " P replied.
"I know of Asian people who prefer caucasians as lovers over their own races. But it's the Chinese who would proclaim that they will NEVER take a Chinese for a lover," his beautiful eyes looked at P.
She made a weak attempt at suggesting the possibilities of why. More along the lines of the Sarong Party Girl.
"Well, I am a-racial. So I never have that issue and never attempt to hide my 'Chinese-ness' (or 'Chee-na-ness' as people from where P came from would proffer). I wasn't attracted to you cos' you are white, in case you are wondering..."
To kickstart her annotations of identity observations and discussions, P would like to point out that when it comes to the subject of human attraction, especially in taking on a lover, her preference is not dictated by the colour of one's skin.
She is what she termed herself as "a-racial".
The aura of the potential lover takes precedence over everything. That includes her strong appeal for good intellect.
****
The Banana
When P lived a short-lived charmed life out in Paris where she learnt under couture legends that once worked at the House of Balengciaga and the House of Chanel, she was one of the two pure Asians amongst the disciples.
The other girl was an American Chinese girl. A New Yorker. She took great effort initially to distant herself from P and applied major dexterity in associating herself with the white girls. Until, P became to most popular girl in her class.
This, being a result of P's sociable and open personality. Her peers and her mentor deemed her interesting and lacking in the conservative and calculativeness that is associated with the Chinese race.
It appeared that P's Chinese friend, C would not date an Asian man, for the same reason that their white peers have had generalised of Asians. P also understood that she has a very male chauvinistic father who caused much discontent in her parents' marriage.
So she never dated an Asian. She attempted to disengage herself from being associated with all things Chinese. She deemed Asian men all as male chauvinistic and screwed up.
As P has a fussy "Asian" palate that did not take kindly to having baguettes or crossiants as part of her daily diet and would often insist on buying Chinese takeaway, C would remarked, "You are being so Chinese."
"Don't you think I am so crossed-over?" she would sometimes ask the group boastfully (perhaps for assurance that she is beginning to "whiten", if not in her physical appearance, at least her soul) as she would recount the number of white men that she has dated.
Banana- white on the inside, yellow on the outside.
The funny thing is, C is a "Chinese" through and through.
If ever there is such a thing as a typical "Mandarin" face. C has small slit eyes, thick lips and wide mouth. Her nose is a good normal size, face is a long oval and she has the straightest and blackest shoulder-length hair that a blue blooded oriental could have.
And she has also revealed that her ultimate dream in life is to get married and be a mother; just like any compliant and virtuous Chinese wife should aspire to be.
****
In Between
Dope likes to think of himself as more asian than caucasian because of his restraint and his conservative personality he associated with the Asian culture. He attributed this to his Asian biased upbringing from his Chinese mother who ran the household and his lack of contact from the estranged side of his Caucasian father's family.
When Dope was growing up, he went to a Boys' Grammar School. Therein, he was one of the six non-caucasian boys. Well, not quite, since he is partly white. So he stood solo as the only Eurasian boy who got picked on a lot at school. For a lack of clear distinction in his racial identity.
Dope was constantly teased by the white boys as somewhat of a freak while he was regarded with warmer solidarity from his Asian peers. He was deemed a privilege to his Asian group of friends who attempted to seek entry and acceptance into the caucasian community. So he was bestowed with an unspoken superiority and respect within this group.
At university, he started hanging out mostly with Asian guys with the increased choice of cultural diversity. He felt it a natural transition.
It appears that dick sizes comprised a good part of male locker room discussions for that age. So Dope came to being in one of these situations. Being the more sterotypically conservative Asian crowd, comparisons amongst his peers were so much confined only to the measurements of the hand spans, and not extended to actual public displays. Dope, being a very tall and lanky individual won in the finger measurement contest.
The penis envy experienced by his Asian friends was quickly translated to jealousy. They accused his truimphant manhood as a given case of his "whiteness", an attempt to reconcile their differences through his "otherness".
Herein, Dope continues to live on the social pheriphery where he served as the integration point for the duality of his race and paradoxically, as an outsider when deemed fit by his pure blooded peers.
*****
The Egg
Long ago, P met a guy at university. Being as caucasian as anyone could tell, with a deep interest in the Asian culture and who spoke Japanese fluently and mandarin in the works, he explained his deepfelt connection with the Asian race. The Asian race, however, consist of vast and varied ethnicities. Nontheless, he summarised himself aptly.
"I am like an egg- white on the outside, yellow on the inside."
So that was how P came to be acquainted with "the egg".
****
The Coconut
During one of C's bantering sessions of drawing attention to herself as a cross-over, P mentioned about her introduction to the term "egg".
It was here that C added another term to P's vocabulary of the mistaken and the confused soul, "the coconut".
Definition of the "coconut"- black on the outside and white on the inside, a main reference to the Indian race.
****
M's Observations
"The Chinese must be the most racist race against their own kind," M remarked.
He searched P's face for an answer.
"I don't know. Why? " P replied.
"I know of Asian people who prefer caucasians as lovers over their own races. But it's the Chinese who would proclaim that they will NEVER take a Chinese for a lover," his beautiful eyes looked at P.
She made a weak attempt at suggesting the possibilities of why. More along the lines of the Sarong Party Girl.
"Well, I am a-racial. So I never have that issue and never attempt to hide my 'Chinese-ness' (or 'Chee-na-ness' as people from where P came from would proffer). I wasn't attracted to you cos' you are white, in case you are wondering..."
