Thursday, April 20, 2006
Reconvening
In fifteen minutes' time, P is due to meet The Man for the first time. Post intimacy, post wedding (his). She wonders if there is really anything left to say.
Three minutes ago, she picked up her phone. He sounded calm and distant. She half did not expect that incoming call with that unfamiliar number to be his. He used to dial on a private number. So when she picked up, she spoke in her usual professional and spritely tone. Reserved for work and any unforeseen calls.
His seriousness and formality made her a little unsure of herself and she wondered given the uncertainty of the situation,should she have adopted a more composed tone?
Then again, why did he bother to agree meeting up if he wasn't keen? She proposed the "catch up" (as she is wont to put it "casually") and he could have said no.
Although he did sounded non-committal. His sms went like this,"Text me if you are finished and I'll see if I'm done. Then we could grab a drink if you're still around."
Like the wary prey and predator roaming and circling the other within close quarters, they both must need to make their moves very carefully. Only this time, P feels somewhat unsure which role The Man is playing. And they tread precariously on the tight rope as they inched their ways a little closer into the other's personal zone. Both playing their cards close to their chests.
In fifteen minutes' time, P is due to meet The Man for the first time. Post intimacy, post wedding (his). She wonders if there is really anything left to say.
Three minutes ago, she picked up her phone. He sounded calm and distant. She half did not expect that incoming call with that unfamiliar number to be his. He used to dial on a private number. So when she picked up, she spoke in her usual professional and spritely tone. Reserved for work and any unforeseen calls.
His seriousness and formality made her a little unsure of herself and she wondered given the uncertainty of the situation,should she have adopted a more composed tone?
Then again, why did he bother to agree meeting up if he wasn't keen? She proposed the "catch up" (as she is wont to put it "casually") and he could have said no.
Although he did sounded non-committal. His sms went like this,"Text me if you are finished and I'll see if I'm done. Then we could grab a drink if you're still around."
Like the wary prey and predator roaming and circling the other within close quarters, they both must need to make their moves very carefully. Only this time, P feels somewhat unsure which role The Man is playing. And they tread precariously on the tight rope as they inched their ways a little closer into the other's personal zone. Both playing their cards close to their chests.
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
Waiting
It seems like P spent a good part of her life waiting- for people who matter to her.
As she writes now, she is waiting on Dope. It's been exactly four weeks the last time they met. In fact, during that last meeting, they literally just met for a good fifteen minutes and then they parted. To fit in time for his busy schedule, he has agreed to meet her for a "quickie" (as she calls it mischievously). His entourage (consisting of his Designated Love and her "baby" brother) awaited him at home for dinner.
So then she decided to walk him home.
Now she is kept waiting yet again and she wonders by the time she finally sees him, if she would once again be granted only half an hour of his time (conscious of his schedule on a Wednesday with the entourage waiting for him)?
She wonders why she even subjects herself to this?
When she too, has an ever loyal and loving Designated Love awaiting for her to return to.
****
Life is all about doing time, isn't it? she wonders.
Even her Designated Love is a growth investment- one she needs to hold out and do the hard yards long enough before she could possibly reap her returns. Or rather, get her peace of mind.
So she continues working on it. And she waits for that day to come. When luck and opportunities would have it that this wandering ship would finally decide to hang up her sails and return forever to the security of her designated harbour.
****
P is working her way back to Paris. She needs to "touch base" with her soul and re-capture those lost moments that she had lived recklessly but very much on her own terms .
So she continues counting the days that have passed between now and her time in Paris, the skeletons in her closet that would continue to haunt her till the very end of her time, but she would have never have given up a single day of re-living those painful memories just once more....
And hopefully, she might cross romantic paths with her funny boy yet again. Being third time lucky.
****
M came and went in P's life. From Paris to Singapore and she wonders where next. At the start of the year, he visited her for the weekend when P returned home. She gave him very short notice and was surprised when he turned up.
Currently based in Hong Kong, he is hoping for P to visit.
Hong Kong trip 2006 is high on her agenda and she awaits, doing time at work before she could be granted time off to see her beautiful boy again. And then god knows, where fate and opportunities would take her Chilean/ English boy to?
But then she wonders (everytime her heart aches with that last memory), what's the point?
It seems like P spent a good part of her life waiting- for people who matter to her.
As she writes now, she is waiting on Dope. It's been exactly four weeks the last time they met. In fact, during that last meeting, they literally just met for a good fifteen minutes and then they parted. To fit in time for his busy schedule, he has agreed to meet her for a "quickie" (as she calls it mischievously). His entourage (consisting of his Designated Love and her "baby" brother) awaited him at home for dinner.
So then she decided to walk him home.
Now she is kept waiting yet again and she wonders by the time she finally sees him, if she would once again be granted only half an hour of his time (conscious of his schedule on a Wednesday with the entourage waiting for him)?
She wonders why she even subjects herself to this?
When she too, has an ever loyal and loving Designated Love awaiting for her to return to.
****
Life is all about doing time, isn't it? she wonders.
Even her Designated Love is a growth investment- one she needs to hold out and do the hard yards long enough before she could possibly reap her returns. Or rather, get her peace of mind.
So she continues working on it. And she waits for that day to come. When luck and opportunities would have it that this wandering ship would finally decide to hang up her sails and return forever to the security of her designated harbour.
****
P is working her way back to Paris. She needs to "touch base" with her soul and re-capture those lost moments that she had lived recklessly but very much on her own terms .
So she continues counting the days that have passed between now and her time in Paris, the skeletons in her closet that would continue to haunt her till the very end of her time, but she would have never have given up a single day of re-living those painful memories just once more....
And hopefully, she might cross romantic paths with her funny boy yet again. Being third time lucky.
****
M came and went in P's life. From Paris to Singapore and she wonders where next. At the start of the year, he visited her for the weekend when P returned home. She gave him very short notice and was surprised when he turned up.
Currently based in Hong Kong, he is hoping for P to visit.
Hong Kong trip 2006 is high on her agenda and she awaits, doing time at work before she could be granted time off to see her beautiful boy again. And then god knows, where fate and opportunities would take her Chilean/ English boy to?
But then she wonders (everytime her heart aches with that last memory), what's the point?
