Wednesday, September 22, 2010

 
I can't wait...

for the days to go by.

Hurry up, hurry up... I hear the voice in my heart.

This week, the sun is out. Every morning feels like a great day as I walk my dog with a sense of anticipation in my heart.

By afternoon, I would usually have done all my to do things on the list in my home office. Calls put out to see how the deals are looking.

My whip have been cracking hard. I aim for 3 done deals by the end of October.

Looking great it seems. I continue to hold my breath.

Hopefully, by this Friday I can ring the bell.

Ding-a-ling! Like what we used to do in our headhunting days when the deal was done and dusted. But most importantly, paid.

It will be my very first deal.

Finally. It has been a long year.

Now I can't wait for January to come.

Vanuatu will beckon. So I have planned.

A much needed new car by 2010. It's looking like a Golf GTI. DL's toy to keep him happy for a bit.

With dog, cash in bank, new car and a nice holiday in the South Pacific, it's back to happy family mode.

I've set my sights on a few modest apartments in the Sydney Eastern suburbs.

If things go as planned, I will be shopping by February 2011. A nice little apartment in my name, for starters;)

Monday, September 20, 2010

 
Unclouding

There is always something nostalgic about reading testimonials from alumni students on the fashion institute I attended. Students dating back to the graduating class of early 80s and how that summer in Paris changed their careers, if not life. Then there are the latest graduating class all hyped up and excited about how living and studying fashion in Paris had opened the doors for them.

I was once there. The European summer of 2004. It wasn't too long ago or was it?

Often, I wonder where this 30ish years of my life have taken me, especially in the last decade. My life experience and misadventures have re-invented my personas a few times over. From a struggle to a high and now back to earth- I have been that struggling student, living abroad, to that ever so popular social queen to that up and coming corpoate flyer to that emotional wreck to an at peace, ambition-less housewife to where I am today.

Back on earth, I am. And quite penniless.

But Paris- it still holds my imagination. I still feel the tingles and excitement at the thought of fashion designing and Paris.

Perhaps one must have something to dream and look to in the future when life seems rather uninspiring and bleak at the moment, no?

So each night, I study the textbooks and design books and the fashion business books I have amassed as a before bedtime education session. Sometimes, I joint down notes to be used for that business plan that will eventuate at some points in my life.

There is something to look forward to, something to remind me that I am still me- dreamy P who still dares to dream and that there is still much more on the to do list before I die waiting to come to fruition and ticked off before she dies...

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

 
Weirdo

I must have been living on another planet.

Facebook has a way of making me feel so when I start finding old friends through connections with existing friends.

I find myself adding old high school classmates from the time where we were only 13.

Whilst I am struggling to make ends meet Down Under, here I find my old friends in marital and maternal bliss. Obviously they are doing great.

Funny how some of them used to moan about being "broke", having a mum who probably struggled to make ends meet as a single parent or having parents working hard in blue collar jobs to make a decent living.

I was the girl who didn't know what "broke" meant. I even shouted some to food since I was the girl who had $10 pocket money a day. To be precise, I had little regard to money since there will always be more to dip into, wasn't it? Well, that was what I thought.

So people have grown up, did well at school and graduated from university. They find jobs, make their folks proud, found a nice boy (I would hope), got married and made babies. That's what people do at home from the many friends I noticed on Facebook.

Here I am, young/ old P who seems to relate better to the other type. Smart, party set always roaming in social circles- a greater proportion of these people who don't hold a day job like myself. It makes going home seem like such a great holiday, the endless social events, parties and catch ups- long lunches, mindless window shopping and all things superfically brainlessly Singaporean that I so miss. All light-hearted with no "adult" responsibilities. I feel more at home here.

Now I really wanna go home!

I would like to think I am in the process of getting there.

Soon P, soon...;)

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