Restructure- on your own terms

A little step forward...

Today the procrastinator in me finally got down to unpacking my lugguage from my last trip home a few weeks ago and the overnight bag from my last inter-state trip back to DL...

Tomorrow, I will return to my joint abode with DL again. So I packed in some new clothes and a little black number for the cocktal party on Saturday night.

In two weeks' time, I will pack for Asia and back home again.

I lead a messy life. My domestic regime is zilch. My room has newspapers, books, clean clothes strewn all over the floor. Fluff Ball has a penchant for sleeping on clean clothes and peeing on the straying newspapers whenever she cannot hold her bladder any longer while us folks are out.

My work desk is also untidy (despite hints by the boss and fellow colleagues to tidy up) but there, I worked in a more organised mess.

I always believed that a cluttered room reflects a cluttered mind.

When I used to live in a hostel at university and when I first moved into living with DL, I always kept to a strict housekeeping regime. I have never been a domesticated person and had always resided on the messier side but I always hated disorderliness quite ironically. At home, there was always the ever fastidious mother to fix up the problem and in my younger days, we also had the hired help. The next two that came never quite made the cut for the standards of cleanliness that we were (or rather, the lady of the house expects all) to observe at home and inevitably were dismissed within a matter of three months. The first stayed throughout her contract. The man of the house decided to call it quits and said no more paying for the maid penalty taxes (or something in the likes).

But the apartment with DL soon turned into a pig sty as circumstances and the shift in dynamics took a toil on our personal minds. It's like falling into a dark and deep pit and it is hard for one to find one's way up again. Since then, the house never looked quite the same up till today...

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Today I decided to restore some orderliness because I simply cannot stand it anymore and figured it might well be the first step to finding back my spiritual focus and discipline. So I did but with much struggle since I was never quite a packer or an unpacker to start of with. I always got help with packing my things- I never quite caught on that domestic versatility even during my backpacking days. It takes me three hours to pack and unpack what one could possibly do in an hour. It's way too mind boggling for me, I had said to Dr. Jekyll & Hyde on the last day where we spent time. I told him then why I needed to rush due to packing and he had said it should not take me too long.

But little by little...

The study desk is still untouched. Opened folders with thick stack of notes still lay open since my last exam revision in November. The bills needs filing (I love putting them in separate dividers labelled with different categories for credit card bills to bank statements and pay slips) as they have since piled. So are the information and brochures of different properties that I have viewed that needs to go into my property deal file that are separated into different suburbs for my reference to compare rise or fall in values in the future.

I think I'll get there.

I culled some stuff today that needs binning.

Slowly, I think I might be relieving of this physical burden of having too much. Does it accurately reflect one's state of mind too, I often wonder?

It'll take a while before the room looks half decent, not to mention the ensuite bathroom (which stinks for some reason even when I have employed the use of strong disinfectant agents) and then I'll do the living room and all.

Right now, my immediate goal is to take of my personal space first. That is, the bedroom. My proposed targeted completion date is next week.

Hopefully, my will is strong enough to see me through all that cleaning and de-toxing...

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My dear readers, I have yet again side tracked.

I meant to write about a memory triggered off by today's cleaning experience.

In my environmentally conscious effort, I packed away some shopping bags that could be recycled for use later down the track.

I recalled my days as a young teenager in the early 1990s where my fashion supplement involved around periodicals (which no longer exist now) such as Teens, Teenage and Go Magazine (which I did a fashion shoot for once later in that decade). It was the era where owning designer labels or anything deemed "branded" were "the" thing. Everywhere, people substituted carrying proper handbags or bags with branded paper shopping bags. Guess was one of the more popular and affordable brands amongst the youngsters and one could quite easily spot a teenager totting black and white Guess shopping bags accompanied by the omniscence of Anna Nicole Smith on the streets. On the swap, buy or sell section, I remembered feeling slightly amused to read an ad posted by someone to buy "as brand new" designer paper bags. I reckoned it was someone who must be too broke to purchase the merchandise but nonetheless, self conscious enough (possibly by peer pressure) to put up a front.

My amusing obeservation and memories of fashion trends in the 90s- from the loud wealth designer extravaganza fashion fad that left little for the designer-label dressed Ah Lians to buy decent shoes (and hence resorting to wearing white mary jane canvas school shoes) to my even younger days where Espirit (which costs an exorbitant SGD$36 for a T-shirt) gear, Elle bags and Guess jeans were "the" in thing.

It was an era of good economy in Asia and everyone spent up big. I grew up pampered with the limitless pocket money and budgetless spending. I took money from the Mrs.' purse according to my whim and fancy. How was I to know that those charmed days could be over for me five years on?

I remember myself not conforming to the trend as strictly. Or rather, tastelessly, the fashion snob and individualist would much prefer to think.

At 15, I bought myself my first expensive school bag. I figured during that precocious and impressionable time of my existence(where I thought I was grown up and knew what I wanted to do in my life given that we had to now stream into either science or arts and was making THE step to attaining the intended career; screw that Singaporean education system now and am I not glad that I "screwed up" enough for my parents to have to send me away), 15 was the beginning of all things new or rather, the end (of innocence. I did kissed a boy for the first time who first led me away from the path of chastity and I learnt a few naughty things).

So yes, I bought myself a black "Storm of London" school bag with the silver metal handles. It wasn't much of a schoolbag at all since it didn't allow me to hold too many books and was really quite heavy on its own. I remembered it cost me close to SGD$90. It was a cool, semi punk rock bag that I bought at the Storm store at the basement of the then new Ngee Ann City (the store no longer exist as well). As a result,I had made a few new friends in my new class since I got (unsolicited) approval for my somewhat cool and sightly off the convention (of fashionably safe bet of Elle bags) fashion tastes. Yes, since one could only display one's fashion creativity and tastes from the school bags that one carries to school as our daily habit was governed by our ugly girls' school green uniforms.

Sheesh, just realised it's nearly 2a.m and I must've have rambled for a good hour or so. Gotta get my rest since I have a ton of teams to map out and I need all the energy to suppress my frail nerves (whenever I think I am caught out there and I have no way of getting in again to extract relevant information for the team to go for a kill).

Good night everybody. Am I not get glad that the week is nearly over?

P.S. V, do you remember my signature storm schoolbag?
I kind of miss it. 13 years on, I reckon I can use it for client meetings. What do you think? I think it's fff...funky!!! heh!;)